for a person usually so longwinded, being at a complete loss for words is not a fun expirience. I usually have some sort of insight to offer about myself or someone else or some kind of situation, but I find myself completely unable to even begin to know where I’m at, much less provide some kind of personal extrapolation. I find myself very unstable but doing absolutely nothing about it. I’m not even sure if that’s a bad thing yet. I feel very lost in my hopes and dreams and aspirations and even my very ability to be satisfied in basic things. Do we really spend our entire lives chasing satisfaction only to never have it actualized? I feel like that’s the dirty truth that no one wants to admit, like that why our parents tell us we can be president, so that the fact that we will never be satisfied with anything important or longlasting doesn’t ruin ourchildhood or some other freudian bullshit like that. reading ‘how to parent’ books has replaced parenting. I feel very impulsive in thinking that nothing I do will ever bring complete satisfaction anytime soon. I start to feel like sleeping is a waste of time, like I don’t want to miss something important. which is why I’m blogging at 530a

I have to go to Austin City Limits. If any of these bands play at the same time… I will cry.

Willie Nelson
Feist
Guster
Nickel Creek
Damien Rice
Iron and Wine
Matt Nathanson

above all I HAVE to see Guster.

man. in-tents.

… Unless I’m passionate about what I’m doing. The few times that I’ve ridden on the ambulance, I’ve found myself really eager to learn things. This is exciting to me because I’ve always been a terrible employee, because I’ve never had a job I’ve liked, which brings me to my next problem. In about 2 months or so, I should have taken my national registry test and be getting close to getting results, at which point I will be trying to get a job as an EMT-B. I do not however, have a job, though I need one. But it doesn’t make sense to have just another 2 - 3 month job. Maybe some little bs part-time job that pays bad could work. I just need something to keep gas in my car this summer, however bad of a job it is. Besides, come July/August, I’ll have the satisfaction of quitting.

Anyhow, my Captain, Felix, and I are taking our EMT-I (Intermediate) this summer. It’s an 11 week course and will be pretty intense, but totally worth it. Tues, Weds Thurs, 8a - Noon. Not too bad. Then I’ll start my Paramedic fast-track in August. Mon, Tues all day. Then I can knock out my clinicals if I do 16 hour clinical rotations on thursdays. 16 hour shift. at ben taub. lordy lordy.

In the event that I live through that schedule, I should be taken my paramedic test next summer. Then I hope I can get on with Houston Fire Department. woot.

… who feels like the only one.”

when the gospel stops making sense, we’ve got bigger problems than girl-lessnes. but it certainly doesn’t feel like it.

and I don’t mean stop making sense like the gospel ever made sense in the first place. just my ok-ness with it’s not making sense is dwindleing

had to get that off of my chest, it’s been weighing me down for a week.

So Alle and I played at the Sparkplug Arts Festival this past Thursday in the ‘Unplugged Battle of the Bands’ section. We got to the competition, made sure we got the second time slot so that we could slip out and see the Eisley concert at the Meridian. Well as it turns out, we took First Place in the unplugged section!!!

Since we took first in our section, we were given an oppurtunity to compete on Saturday, May 10th, at the Sparkplug All-Stars Festival to compete against some pretty solid, full-out rock bands, and some very tight and powerful worship bands. We were unsure how we, an act consisting of a pair of acoustic guitars and voices, were going to hold up to some VERY VERY talented and compelling bands (Such as Chuck Norris, who I, personally think should’ve taken 1st place) but, sure enough the results were:

1st place: Hailstrom (spelling??????) these guys were very good
2nd place: Chuck Norris (My personal favorite as well as the crowd favorite, in my opinion.)
3rd place: Alle and Frank. Not bad for our first gig.

anyhow here are some pics of us rocking out: